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We've Been Diagnosed With. . .

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New. [21 Apr 2009|03:10am]

[ mood | calm ]

Greetings all.

Obviously I am new, or I wouldn't have written such as the title of the post. My name, for all intents and purposes is Dandy. My assortment of mental professionals over the years have given me quite a few nice little lables, these being:

  1. Depression
  2. Slight autism/Asperger's Syndrome
  3. ADD
  4. Dyscalculia
  5. Sociopathic Personality Disorder
  6. Species Dysphoria Disorder
  7. Gender Dysphoria Disorder
  8. Schizophrenia
  9. And something else I don't particularly remember but had to do with constantly having lucid dreams that are usually on an ongoing, linear timeline. Don't think they ever quite figured that out.

Of all these, I wouldn't be surprised if they were all true, at least at one point or another. I never went on medication for any of these, which bothers some, but I believe I function quite fine on my own. I know that 4 through 7 are true, but I can't really say much for the rest.

Good to meet you all.

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Is this a symptom of something? [04 Feb 2009|07:52am]

I sometimes wake up in the morning with my right hand clenched into a fist so tight that my fingernails - which are not long - are digging into my palm.
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[02 Dec 2008|04:15am]

I have always been here
I have always looked out from behind these eyes
it feels like more than a lifetime
its been more than a lifetime

Sometimes I get tired of the waiting
sometimes I get tired of being in here
is this the way it has always been?
could it ever have been different?

Do you ever get tired of the waiting?
do you ever get tired of being in there?
don't worry, nobody lives forever,
nobody lives forever
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[07 May 2008|07:43pm]

 Good news.  I am out of the mental hospital now.  Fresh air= amazing.
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Written October 5, 2003 by Matthew [12 Jan 2007|05:42pm]

Originally published at Memories of Matthew. Please leave any comments there. All comments posted on LJ will be screened and cross-posted.

Aunt Lizzie has lung cancer. Grampa said the prognosis is not good. I am still in shock just as much as I was last night. Who would have thought a 38 year old could get lung cancer? She doesn’t even smoke. How is that even possible? I feel so bad for her and my cousins.

Read the rest of this entry »

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[13 Oct 2006|11:14am]

Hey everyone

Hopefully this won’t come across as advertising, but I was invited to beta test this site you all might want to check out. It’s called www.lovehealz.com and is basically a mix between Myspace and eHarmony specifically for people with illnesses. They said they are going to be donating millions of dollars to charities like the American Cancer Society and the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society! That’s really why I wanted to post here.

It seems like they’re supporting a really great cause and could really use some additional opinions to make it work.

Here’s the beta code to sign up: RFBETA06
Hope to see you there!

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[21 Aug 2006|09:18am]

So today I woke up and my intestines ( Small and Large ), mainly the small feels like someone came into my room and repeatedly beat my torso with a rolling pin.

this hasn't happened in a while.  I'm thinking that it's just ibs related.  has anyone else had this kind of thing happen??
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a good find! [16 Jun 2006|05:53pm]

now this community is right up my alley. i usually try not to piss and moan all over my own journal about how sick i feel, what a relief to find a few people who don't mind. cheers to you guys, its too much a load for people to have to lock all their woes inside.
as far as i am concerned, i spent a few months in the hospital a year ago because i had a carcinoid tumor in my lung and have to get the lobe chopped out and in the process the docs managed to give me a staff infection and during the treatment for that they punctured something while inserted a lung tube through my back which put me back into more surgery and gave me a couple brushes up against death. afterwards in fear that i would sue they pretty much stopped seeing me and stopped prescribing the pain meds i was supposed to be on for a while longer and then eased off of, so i became a heroin addict as a way of self medicating yay! as of two and a half months ago i am clean of that which is reassuring in some ways but sucks in other because it means i am gaining back all the weight i lost from throwing up almost every time i ate during those 9 months. on top of that the doctors i have seen recently said i should have had my appendix removed because of the connection with lung and appendix carcinoids and the throbbing pain in the side anytime i have to crap that doubles me over in pain for a good half hour a day is not a good sign for the possibility of tumors in the rest of my digestive system (i am procrastinating on the tests to find out). also i have slight case of spastic dysplasia from brain damage when i was born as well as partial seizures simple and complex. i have been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder but it might just be symptoms from the seizures. i have a heart murmur in my arterial something rather and am supposed to be on heart pills (metoprolol) but i don't take them nor do i take the seizure meds because they make me clumsy and tired and i don't always have access to a doctor anyways because i have pretty much chosen to live what i do have of my life traveling. oh and my knees crunch like stepping on bugs every time i bend them because the cartilage is screwed so i can barely hike anymore. i feel too weak to do much of anything lately and none of my friends or family seem to understand that. i don't know anyone who has been in this situation and it scared the piss outta me that i can't just keep up the denial if the symptoms are going to keep getting worse. if it wasn't for my morbid sense of humor and nihilistic outlook i would surely be depressed as well. that being said, i wish you guys all pleasant sensations and entertaining events. cheers.
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whoo! [13 Jul 2006|09:20pm]

The scan showed no recurrence or metastasis

I'm happy!
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Whoo! [03 Jun 2006|10:04pm]

I completed my (hopefully) last chemotherapy treatment last week. On Monday I have to get an MRI done to see if I really am clean this time. 

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HIV/AIDS Study Seeking Participants [22 Apr 2006|05:52pm]


Are you living with HIV/AIDS?

Are there times you want to openly talk about your experience, but feel unable to do so?

Have you experienced discrimination as a result of the diagnosis you are living with?

Are you interested in talking about this experience to contribute to a research project? 

I am interested in talking with individuals living with HIV/AIDS in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada, in order to contribute to a research project regarding HIV/AIDS and stigma.

If you are interested, please contact
Marie at 613-520-2600 (ext. 0264) to leave a message (with your name and a contact phone number) and I will return your call.  To keep your identity confidential, please provide only your first name.

An honorarium will be provided to individuals willing to talk about their experiences. 

Please note that I have disabled comments to protect your confidentiality.  

Thank you for your interest.  I look forward to talking with you soon!

* This research project has been approved by the Carleton University Research Ethics Committee.

[16 Mar 2006|09:17pm]

I am so close to relapsing on my eating disorder. 5'6", 106 lb, and disgusting. I am really getting serious about ballet and realized how far I am from being like the girls at SAB. I really want to fast but I'm afraid of losing strength that I need for pointework, etc.

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sighs [12 Dec 2005|11:52pm]

i am bipolar. i have known since 6th grade. my family and doctors have said i am but refuse to write it down.. they give me lamicil (sp) or something rather. adderal. cylexa. and some other g word drug. my parents keep them away. they are scared because my family doesnt want to admit it and dont want the doctors to tell me... they say maybe she isnt. i have known i was and i hate it... i wish sometimes that theyd just get it out of the way so that in 5 years i dont have to be like oo what now im bipolar. i go to bp support groups and talk to lots of people. my personal counselor has no doubt in her mind. my episodes are terrible and my symptoms quite obvious. i am 15 now. just thought id introduce myself. i'm nikky ♥.. most popular girl at my school.. sighs. being bipolar sucks that much more. everything i do comes back to haunt me.
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[02 Dec 2005|05:54pm]

Just wanted to share this:
I had my third small-bowel resection on May 11th.
In October I was scoped and they found that the Crohn's is back.
Last month my gastro called me to tell me that he can't do anything more for me besides give me antibiotics, pain medication, and have me tube fed if my weight drops.
(This is obviously a man who has never had a tube up his nose.)
So I'm looking into various drastic measures, looking for a new gastro, and feeling like crap.
How's that for quality of life?

I wanted to share this because I still think the concept behind this community is awesome and if nobody else is going to post then I am.
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[05 Nov 2005|10:25pm]


I'm sixteen, name is Verity.

Diagnosed with-- severe clinical depression (ie--attempted suicide about 14 times),post-traumatic stress disorder, hypothyroidism with Hashimoto's Disorder, anorexia nervosa, and non-purging bulimia.

I hope this community will be helpful...it seems like it will be.

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My Surgery [21 Sep 2005|10:46am]

It was on the 8th. I was let go yesterday.

The tumor was extracted and a few ribs were reconstructed. As far as anyone can tell the tumor is gone and no Cancer was found in surrounding areas.

The scars I don't mind (foot long going across my side and two quarter sized prints of where the chest tubes were), but my side imploding on itself I do mind. My shoulder has no meat of rib to rest itself on, so it hangs lower, making my arm look slightly longer.

Better asymmetrical than dead, though.
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It shrunk! [12 Aug 2005|10:39pm]

My tumor shrunk from 3cm to 1cm in only 10 weeks! :D

I'm happy, so I post.

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[23 Jul 2005|06:08pm]

wow guys. I didn't advertise this community, I just made it and forgot about it. I didn't think that anyone would join it!

Anywho, my name is Ruthlyn. I am the maintainer. I am 17 years old and they told me that I have rare and irregular heart palpitations. They don't even know what to call what I have- they just know that I have a fatal heart disease.

I can't ride certain rollercoasters. I can't be in heat too long. I can't get too angry or overwhelmed. I can't eat salty food. I can't eat or drink anything with caffeine. I can kiss Starbucks goodbye. Anywho, I will do more with this community in due time. Thanks for joining!
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Hello [10 Jul 2005|11:56am]

Hi, I'm 17 years old, and I've been recently diagnosed with cancer. I will undergo my third chemotherapy treatment next week.

Just thought I'd join and share

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[03 Jul 2005|12:20am]

Clearly life is crap and really horrible things happen. We all need someone to blame for the problems, disaters, and tragedies. That is why I am here. I want to let you blame me for wahtever it is you need to blame someone for. Even if it could not possible be my fault. This is not a joke I am willing to let you yell at me for whatever and I will apologize. Because in someways it actually is my fault. This is not a joke it's just a new idea. I am trying to make the world better by getting your problems off your back as best I can. I'm sorry for "advertising" this way. It's the best way I know how. Thank you.
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